He Said Peace Be Still - Part 2

Last Friday I woke up extremely short of breath and dizzy. As per my usual solution, I ignore it, figuring it would go away.

It does not go away.

Friday night Phil takes me to an urgent care center. They will not accept me and suggest the Emergency Room.

I am less than happy.

Off we go to the ER to spend a fun-filled Friday night. There are two ambulances parked outside the doors, and the waiting room is almost full. I know we might as well settle down for a long wait.

In a short while I am called back to the triage nurse. I answer question after question and submit to an EKG. Back to the waiting room. Now, called to the registration desk, pertinent information and insurance given. And again, back to waiting.

AHA!

After only a few minutes my name is called and I am wheeled back, huffing and puffing, cutting line in front of all those waiting before me.

When I get to my cubicle an emergency tech is waiting. More questions. Hospital gown. IV started. Blood pressure, pulse ox and heart rhythm; wrapped, wired and reporting.

Now the real waiting begins.

Every once in a while I am poked and prodded, or wheeled away for additional tests.

I still expect to receive a shot of some type, go home, and feel ridiculous for wasting everyone’s time.

The ER doctor comes in and says I will be admitted.

Waiting,

Waiting,

Waiting…

Finally, a room. More questions. More poking. And… rest, for a couple hours anyway.

The next day, more tests, more tubes and ICU. I am dumbfounded! I am alert and I am in little pain.

By Sunday night I am out of ICU and back on the floor. I lose the IV and the oxygen. I feel pretty good when I am very still.

A friend from Sunday School comes to visit and brings me a copy of her sermon notes. The lesson was taken from Psalm 46; Being Still In God’s Presence.

Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God.

“OK God, I do hear you.“ I say. There seems to be this recurrent theme in my life lately.

Last Friday, the first working day of 2009. There is so much for me to do at work to do to close out 2008. There are bills for me to attend to at home. Our Christmas tree is still up, and the house is a mess. And I am thinking, “here I am, stuck in the hospital, and cannot do anything about it.”

At first I worry, my natural tendency. Then, I realize, I cannot do anything about the “storms” that pressure me so, and I am almost joyful at the thought.

I know that God has been trying to teach me for some time now to “BE STILL.”

In my previous blog I said:

“Try as I may, I am lost. I can not find my way to be still. I know what to do, I just don’t know anymore, how to do it.”

God found a way.

Instead of wasting an entire week laid up in a hospital bed, worrying about the things I could not be doing, I had the opportunity for rest. I know it sounds unbelievable that one can find rest in a place where they wake you up several times during the night to take your vital signs and blood.

But it is true.

I take this week as a gift from God. He had to literally knock the wind out of me for me to be still, but I learned that it does not have to all depend on me. I do not have to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. During last week I had many moments to be still and to seek God.

I am sure this last week was not the best way for me to begin a new work year. I am sure I will not feel quite so peaceful when I return and see the state of my desk. However, I am also certain God watched over me and gave me rest and stillness in the midst of my illness, to renew me, to teach me a new lesson, and a new beginning for a new year.

This year, I will remember that being still before God does a body more good than the same time spent worrying.

Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.